Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Blood - Not so Thick

2 days until I have a one year old.

2 days people!

Ready for the kicker? I have a family member who has NEVER congratulated me on the Jellybean.

Sent a "We're pregnant" announcement.


My parent's mentioned I had a baby. Via emergency C-section. Who was in the NICU for two weeks.


My nephew hand-delivered a birth announcement.


I sent a Christmas Card. As did my parents.


It's been almost two years since I've exchanged words with this person. I'm talking a CLOSE family member too. (In bloodline terms - obviously not through actions)

In sharp contrast - my neighbor down the street - brought over cards and cookies for us. She comments on all of my Facebook posts. Comes by to chat and see how my "folks" are doing.

My online friends have oohed and aahed over Jellybean from day one. Mind you I have never actually met any of them IRL.

This person I spent years interacting with.

Despite what other's may say - Blood is not always thicker than water. Sometimes the fact that there is supposed to be a stronger connection and loyalty there makes the case for separation that much stronger.

To me family isn't necessarily dictated by blood lines. I have people in my life who I consider family and care for as deeply as if we shared the same parents. One case - my ex-fiancee's (who is deceased) family. I don't care what anyone says - they are my family too. There is NOTHING I wouldn't do for them.

Many of my bloggy friends out there have been my greatest support system through pregnancy and mommyhood. That first year is rough. Shell sent me maternity clothes. Genevieve has commiserated on non-sleeping, booby addicted little boys. Tori has always been so encouraging when those breastfeeding session get rough. That is just a small morsel of support and acknowledgement I have gotten from so many. Seeing the care and compassion total strangers can offer you makes you realize that its okay if some people choose not to be a part of your life - when there are so many others who are choosing to be a BIG part of your life.

To everyone in my life - Thank you for being there for me. It means the world to me.

This post is linked up with Shell as part of Pour Your Heart Out Wednesdays.


angela said...

That's too bad :( I like that you've chosen to find and create family out of friends-people who have shown they are willing to support and love you in all of your endeavors.

Angie said...

I hate when things like that happen. But it sounds like you have a good way of looking at it and dealing with it. Doesn't make it any less painful though

Kakunaa said...

You are family to me, too. Love you, lady :-)

Shell said...

Relatives have definitely let me down. Being related hasn't seemed to mean much, unfortunately. Thank God for the "families" we can choose ourselves!

Sara said...

Some relatives just suck! My grandma hasn't acknowledged A's birth yet, and she's seen her twice! It's sad how sometimes family can be so, lame! The "family" we have through blogging is so amazing!

Adrienne said...

Families are the people who NEVER let you down. Thank God we can choose our friends! Happy birthday to your little guy!!

I will ask my sister about the donations for that family. I'll get back to you! What your email? You are "no-reply".

Self Sagacity said...

True that sometimes blood isn't thicker than water. I do choose my family members to bond to, because luckily I have many to choose from. Congrats on the little man.
New follower.

Niki said...

that person is a moron and it is their loss

Jackie said...

Why is it that our families let us down? Especially when we need or want them in our lives the most.

I'm glad that you've found the friends & family through blogging! The blogging community is one of the best things ever!

Katrina said...

You know, more often than not it's family that ends up being the most hurtful to us. I wonder why that is? When my first child was born, my mother told her father about the arrival of his FIRST great-grandchild, and she asked him, "Do you want me to send you a picture?" and he replied, "Naw. You seen one scream'n baby you seen them all." He was such a hateful person. He never sent a card, never called - nothing. Through me he had nine great-grandchildren...but he died without meeting any of them. So sad.

Missy L said...

It is such a bummer when family acts like that :(

I'm glad that you have a great support system!

It's their loss, indeed!

Sara @ Domestically Challenged said...

That is some hard stuff to deal with. It is hard enough when it is just you, but to ignore your child? Who has nothing to do with anything? Mean! I'm glad you have others to take the place of someone who doesn't belong!


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