Today my oldest nephew turns 21.
I’m booking the pavilion for Jellybean’s 2nd birthday party.
My oldest nephew and niece from my middle sister have a girlfriend and boyfriend. That they go on dates with. Not just holding hands in the cafeteria type dates.
I’m almost halfway through this pregnancy with Jujube.
Christmas is less than a week away. (And I have none of my homemade gifts made yet that I need to distribute Friday. I also haven’t mailed Christmas Cards yet!)
Time is flying by. Each day is so bittersweet.
I watch Jellybean. So advanced for his age and learning more every day. I’m proud but I almost want to yell, “Stop! Slow down. Mommy’s not ready!”
He is though. Mommy will never be ready.
My sister sent me a picture of my nephew snuggling in a chair with his girlfriend and wrote “It’s so sweet but my heart is breaking a little bit.”
I get it. I think of our parents. Getting older. Their babies have babies. They wonder where the time went. Weren’t they just kissing our boo boos? Now they call during dinner time and we have to rush them off the phone as we simultaneously wash dishes, cook and throw elmo crackers at our kids with the promise of I’ll call you back later.
Then we forget or fall asleep.
But what if we don’t get the chance for later?
Today, right now is all we have.
Christmas isn’t a guarantee. Neither is this weekend. That birthday party or anything else.
I don’t need life to slow down.
I need to slow down .
Put the laptop away. Not rush through bath time so I get some extra down time. Make the twenty minute drive to my parent’s so they feel loved. Shut my mouth when I’m feeling crabby and say “I love you” to Joey instead of nagging. Send the Christmas Card to my oldest sister even if we don’t really talk.
Remember that every moment counts.