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Tuesday, November 15, 2011

The Glamorous Life of Your Average Blogger

I think we all tend to think that the other bloggers out there lead more glamorous lives then we do. That they somehow manage to do it all and still have time to relax. So just in case you were starting to think that I lead one of those glamorous lives I am going to take you through the past 24 hours in my life.

Sunday night - 10 pm
Get Jellybean to sleep for the 5th time that night

10:27pm
Jellybean wakes up with a bloodcurling scream because he is teething.

10:52pm
Jellybean falls back asleep

11:35pm
Bloodcurling scream

11:37pm
Tylenol for the Jellybean
(and a shot of Tequila for me! Kidding!)
Walk around the house until Jellybean falls back asleep.
Leave him in bed with me at this point because I dare not wake him.

12:15ish am
Drift off to sleep finally.

1:15am
Bloodcurling scream (from Jellybean - but I'm tempted to join him)
Rock, soothe and nurse him back to sleep

1:45am
Fall back asleep

2:30am
Crying (from Jellybean and me..a little bit)
Repeat 1:15 am routine

3:45am
See 1:15am

4:45am
See 3:45am

5:30am
Ignore alarm clock

5:45am
Ignore alarm clock and shove boob in Jellybean's mouth for breakfast.

6:00am
Ignore alarm clock and switch boobs.

6:10am
Drag myself out of bed and watch ironically as the Jellybean sleeps peacefully.

6:15am
Put dinner in the crock pot, get dressed, pack Jellybean's bag for the day.

6:30am
Tell hubby he's going to get fired if he does't get his ass out of bed.

6:45am
Try to place Jellybean in the car sleeping.
He wakes up and fights getting strapped into the car seat like a rabid octopus.

6:50am
Consider that shot of Tequila again but instead drive to work, talk to my dad and watch Jellybean sucking away on his fingers.

7:15am
Arrive at day care - top the Jellybean off with boobie juice and carry him, his bag and a pack of diapers in. Stay a few extra minutes as Jellybean has a meltdown over me leaving.

7:39am
Get to work 9 minutes late due to above meltdown.

7:42am
COFFEE!

8:00am
Publix Sweet Tea.

8:15am
Start reading updates, work on an entry form my company's facebook page, try to find a file from 2006 that someone requested..

8:45am
Water

9:30am
Start hitting the snooze button on my reminder to pump while I keep searching for that file.

10:20am
Admit defeat on the file and start pumping.

11:00am
Make lunch plans with coworker to celebrate my birthday late

12:15pm
Go pick Jellybean up and meet coworker at Olive Garden.

12:30pm
Decide I should never have introduced Jellybean to drinking out of my straw since I'll never get my drink back now.

1:15pm
Wrap up lunch, try to hit a store to grab supplies for work. Line is 12 years long so I put all my crap back and wrangle Jellybean into his car seat again to drop him back off at day care.

1:45pm
Return Jellybean and run off before he realizes it.

1:50pm
Back at work.

2:00pm
Try finding the damn file again while sucking down a Peppermint Frappucino the best coworker ever got me!

3:30pm
Decide to skip my afternoon pumping session.

4:30pm
Quitting time.

4:40pm
I hate that damn car seat.

4:42pm
Attempt to talk to my mom on the way home but can't hear her over Jellybean's screaming.

4:47pm
Still screaming

5:00pm
Jellybean passes out as I exit off the interstate.

5:15pm
Jellybean wakes up as I try to get him out of the car seat. We let the dog off his leash and go feed the chickens and change their water.

5:25pm
Place Jellybean in his walker with some cookies while I add gnocchi to the crock pot, put biscuits in the oven, and shred the chicken from the crock pot in the food processor. Pull Jellybean's diner out of the crock pot to cool.

5:45pm
Hubby calls to say he is finally on his way home. Go in Jellybean's room with him to play. Lots of giggling.

6:00pm
Decide to do a shower with Jellybean before his dinner.

6:10pm
Shower done. Jellybean in a diaper and bib in his high chair.

6:15pm
Jellybean is eating a biscuit and drinking some juice.

6:20pm
Attempt to give Jellybean some chicken and dumplings aka gnocchi

6:21pm
Exhausted Jellybean meltdown
Wipe him down and pull him out

6:25pm
Jammies on and nursing him to sleep
Inhale sweet baby smell

6:47pm
He's out
Start rinsing dishes.

7:14pm
He's up - hungry from lack of dinner. More boob - repeat this every 30 minutes until 10pm when he's finally out for good.

7:30pm
Hubby finally gets home.

7:40pm
I sweep, then I mop the floors with bleach and water because they are disgusting.

8:05pm
Finally eat dinner. Let hubby know he can shower since I've drained the mop water from the tub.

8:15pm
Laugh hysterically when hubby goes out to his work truck in this get up.
 Then I go back to tackling Mt. Laundry
8:55pm
Start putting laundry away, bitch at hubby for wadding clothes up like a 13 year old boy and stuffing them in random places!

9:00pm


9:02pm
Ignore this

9:15pm
Stuff diapers

9:17pm
Jellybean wakes up...again

9:46pm
Resume stuffing diapers. Start telling hubby to go to bed since he's snoring on the couch.

10pm
Hubby finally goes to bed

10:06pm
I finally sit down, check email, Facebook, ebay and start blogging this.

10:53pm
Done with all that, a snack and time for bed

Somewhere in there I also got Jellybean's food ready for daycare tomorrow, pulled food out for dinner tomorrow and did some more laundry.

So are you jealous of my glamorous life yet? :)

5 comments:

coronaryrn said...

LOL...sounds like a busy life... I am looking for bloggers to participate in 25 Day's of Christmas Blogshare...check out the post and leave a comment if you are interested in participating!

WhisperingWriter said...

Your life sounds like mine.

Crap, I need to go do laundry.

Shell said...

All so glamorous! ;)

Helene said...

Oh dear, I can relate. I can so relate.

Hope both you and Jellybean get a better night's sleep tonight.

The Suburban Princess said...

This totally sounds like my life. lol!

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