Have you read this article? Mad at Dad
I was reading it and just kept thinking - "Yes, yes, and oh yes!"
I like the mom's in the article feel like I do the lion's share of the work with really nothing reciprocated back to me. It's not just due to Jellybean though. I did it before him but now my work load has increased in direct proportion to the hubby's laziness increasing.
It got me to thinking - "What have I done for myself lately?"
The answer was - nothing.
My life has revolved around the Jellybean, the hubby and everything that needs to get done.
The hubby has the luxury of being able to take his time on the way home. Stop off here or there if he wants to visit a friend or go fishing.
I can't do that. I have pick up duty from day care. Jellybean has to eat by 6:30 at the latest or he turns into an evil ankle biting monster! I walk in the door around 5:30 or so which doesn't leave much time to get a meal on the table.
Last night - I was determined to do something for me. Dinner was in the crock pot ready to go. The moment hubby walked in the door I let him know he was watching Jellybean and feeding him dinner. I was going for a run. My first time working out in over a year.
I only took 11 minutes to myself. That's what it took me run a mile. I am hurting today. But yesterday - it felt great. I was energized afterwards. (Good thing too, since hubby passed out around 7pm and I still had to fix lunches, wash dishes, fold laundry AND get today's dinner prepped!)
It's not going to end with just that one thing though. I AM going to carve out time for myself from now on. I'd love to switch roles for just a week so he can see how much I really do. From meal planning, baby wrangling robbing Peter to pay Paul and tending to the house. I do it all. While he feels like Dad of the year if he takes Jellybean outside to play for an hour and gives him a bath.
Luckily that article also had a Part 2 - Getting Past the Anger. So I'll be trying to implement some of those changes. the hard part though is getting my hubby to stick to the changes. He is about impossible to change on any level. Like most men he's pretty one dimensional and doesn't see everything else that needs to get done. He sees the remote and the TV and the couch.
But since I'm mad at him right now he is pretty close to seeing the end of having clean clothing (I didn't wash any of his this week) and if he keeps it up the end of meals he likes. I personally am a fan of tofu and seaweed so if I need to switch to cooking with those for awhile to institute the change - I will.
That is what I'm doing for myself lately.
How about you?
This post is linked up with Shell as part of Pour Your Heart Out Wednesdays.