Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Breaking Up is Hard to Do - PYHO

At first it seemed like the ideal situation.

She brought me presents. Checked to see how I was doing.

Sent text messages. Made sure I was okay and happy with how things were going.

Then slowly things started to deteriorate. The communication was becoming less and less. She kept wanting more time apart. Making ridiculous demands.

I just wasn't happy with the way things were going. Especially with how much I was paying for her services.

So I started calling around. Making a few visits. Lining up other prospects.

I didn't want to go through with it but I was afraid the time had come.

I'm going to have to break up with Jellybean's daycare.

I interviewed and visited the place I am leaning towards. Joey still needs to go pay a visit. I really, really like their program and approach though.

The current day care isn't working for me for a multitude of reasons. Their open door policy really isn't one. You can't go in and actually be with your child. When I go at lunch I have to go outside with him. I end up nursing him in my car pretty often. I don't mind on nice days when we can go to the park but it's not the ideal situation. Meals are not included in what I pay so every night I have to scramble to pack his meals for the next day after finishing dinner, baths and bedtime. Her rate doesn't decrease until he is 2. I don't see lesson plans or know what types of activities he was working on that week or what I can reinforce at home. I've never gotten an incident report even when he's visibly bonked himself. There is always a new holiday they are closed for and no leniency in paying late if let's say he was sick for an entire week and I wasn't going to drive 25 miles to make a payment rather than wait for Monday. Also no option to use that week he was gone as a  vacation week despite the fact that I never used ours last year.

So the new place. I felt like I was having an affair. I snuck over at lunchtime with Jellybean to check it out. It was fate from the first moment. The owners name - also Diana. How could I not like it. 6 students to a teacher for ones and twos. No infants. They stress vocabulary, bilingual education and plenty of sensory activities - like what I do with him at home. Meals are provided. They have a uniform. The rate is $25 less a week through August. All of the closings match up with my days off of work. As soon as I mentioned I was still nursing Jellybean she immediately said "Oh well you can send milk or come in and feed him. Whatever works for you. I don't have a rocking chair anymore though." So I can come nurse him before nap time there and get him to settle down. Anytime I want. The more she talked and I visited the more I loved it. They go all the way through Pre-K with certified teachers. Lots of outdoor time.

It's hard to make a change. I know he gets attention and love where he is now but educationally I don't think they are doing enough. I feel like I'm always trying to make up for things he doesn't get there. I also hate that their open door policy really isn't. I need a place that will let me come in and get down on the floor and play with him a minute if he isn't ready to leave. Not rush me out the door with a see you tomorrow.

So on Monday - when his current day care is closed AGAIN for President's Day, Jellybean is doing a trial day at the new place. To see how we both like it. If all goes well - we will give our two weeks notice the next day at his current facility and make the break.

Because my job is to make sure he is getting everything he needs and sometimes that means drastic changes. Even if they are hard for both of us at first.

This post is linked up with Shell as part of Pour Your Heart Out Wednesdays.


Sara @ Domestically Challenged said...

Good for you! I had to change daycare once with each child, and it is HARD! Asher did NOT start out well at the new daycare, but after a week? he settled in perfectly. He is now BFF with our providers husband, and they spend hours playing together. So worth it!

Jenn [ Crippled Girl ] said...

you need a two week notice to end a service? That. is. insane. Okay sure, it's daycare but its still a business. You don't need two weeks notice to change dry cleaners or the gas station you go to. Unreal.

Kudos to you - I hope the transition goes smoothly! :)

Melissa Maloney said...

Making change is hard, but if it's what is necessary for his well being in any way than it's the best decision all around.
I hope everything goes well!

Shell said...

It sounds like the new place is a much better fit! Good luck!

Anonymous said...

You have to do what is right for your child. I went thru a similar situation with my now 4 YO son. When he started at his previous daycare it was all wine & roses, but over the course of the almost 2 years he was there, deteriorated dramatically. He was bitten by the same boy 16 times over 3 months. We moved to a new "learning center" with lesson plans, great teachers & caretakers & with an actual food plan. your child will adjust - it's remarkable how resilient they are.

Awn said...

It's a hard thing to do, or so I'm told. I'm glad you've found a (almost) new place! Good luck on Monday to Jellybean.

Emmy said...

Oh that would be so hard. I hope he loves his new place. I thinki would feel guilty about leaving the old place too- but sounds like it has to be done and our kids are what matter most not what others may think.

Anonymous said...

Good for you! Glad you were able to make the switch!

Anonymous said...

Def. sounds like the new place will be better.
I found it hard to leave our daycare, I loved it a lot, but she was closing so we had no choice :) + Jbird needed to go to preschool.

Baby Steps Mommy said...

Everything happens for a reason...dont feel bad for acting on it. You are right to say you need to make the right decisions!

Sorta Southern Single Mom said...

Sounds like the new place is a better fit for your family and that's what's important. Still hard to leave the old place, but easier when you know it's a better fit! Good luck!

Denise said...

Seems like it will be the best thing. Sometimes you have to just break up and move on.


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