Drumroll please........I have an announcement to make

In my defense, I attempted to post this but my internet was down....AGAIN. I really need to call Brighthouse!

I have been promising BIG NEWS for almost a week now. I've always thought there is nothing worse than a tease so I am finally ready for the big reveal.

We are happy to say that after 22 months, 19 cycles, countless doctors appointments, medication up the ying yang, tears, frustration and general insanity - we finally saw this -





I was initially waiting for the results of my beta to make the announcement but I won't get those until Tuesday as my doctor's office closed on Thursday without giving me the results. Argh. We told family today and every stick I pee on tells me I'm pregnant so we're going to believe it.

Our estimated due date is February 3, 2011. So far I've been feeling okay. I've had some morning sickness and get nauseous if I go to long without eating. I'm dealing with your usual headaches and cramps and am ready for bed at 9 most nights. I'm not complaining though. This is what we have been waiting for.

Needless to say - I cancelled the appointment with the new RE. I'm so glad 100mg of Clomid was all we needed as we had no idea how we were going to come up with the money for anything more invasive. To everyone still struggling with IF - my heart goes out to you and I will keep praying you see that BFP! I am so excited to be going through this latest adventure. Right now we still have a ton of questions - is it one or two? Will I be considered high risk given my small size? Can I fly to Houston at the end of June? I'm glad I have all of you to share this journey with!

I am a flippen genius!

So I shared with you yesterday about how my camera decided to crap out on me. Needless to say I was not a happy camper about that. I was even less happy when I found out that it only had a 90 day warranty on it. Thanks Wal-Mart, Thanks! So I figured I was going to have to shell out another $100 for a new camera and that was that. Before I went ahead and charged up the credit card I decided to consult my answer to everything - Google to see if Dr. Google could fix it. I browsed through 18,347 useless sites and finally came across the simplest advice ever. Take the batteries and memory card out, let it sit over night so it resets and then put everything back in. I took a deep breath this morning and hit the power button! PRAISE JESUS - IT WORKS!! That my friends is why I am a flippen genius. $100 saved and I still have a better camera than the hubby! :)

Speaking of the hubby, he finally fixed his car last night so that meant that today was the first morning I could sleep in. I guess I was ridiculously excited about the idea of sleeping in since I celebrated by waking up at 4:30am instead. At 5 I finally got out of bed since I realized I was not going to fall back asleep. So, laundry is folded and somewhat put away, the bunny has been moved back to his outdoor cage for the day, I'm caught up on the news and I will probably crash by 7pm.

I also learned an important lesson last night - NEVER take the hubby grocery shopping with you. More importantly - NEVER let him have control of the cart. My freezer is now an intricate arrangement that an architect would be proud of. My pantry has spilled over into the cupboards and my checking account is writhing in pain. Yeah - it was that bad.

Remember that BIG NEWS I promised you? Can you make it until tomorrow night? I hope so because it is coming!!

Still trying to get caught up

Sorry for abandoning all of you lately. Its been a really intense week and I'm just not getting much time on the computer. Joey's car is messed up (AGAIN) so I've been waking up at 5am so I can drop him off at work and then back track to my job. Then its 9 hours in the office. Drive home and tackle chores, kids etc. I haven't logged on at home since before we left for Mississippi. Somewhere in there I figured out that my camera which I just purchased in October is telling me there is a lens error. Grrr. I haven't gotten a chance to contact Sanyo about it yet.

In awesome news - my dad got the results of his blood work back and his cholesterol had dropped over 100 points since he was in the hospital. that is AH-MAZ-ING! (Yes I know amazing is spelled wrong. It was for emphasis.)

That's really all I have for you for now. I will try my hardest to write up a real post soon.

Post It Note Tuesday - Sorry, I slack

I swear I didn't fall off the face of the earth!

I had an extremely busy week at work last week so I didn't have any energy to spare for the computer once I got home. On Friday we left for Mississippi to pick up my stepson and Joey's nephew and drove back (12 hours) yesterday. So pardon me while I get caught up.

If you are here from ICLW - Welcome. Thank you for dropping by.  Quick backstory. We have been TTC since July 0f 08. I'm on my third cycle of Clomid and currently in the 2ww but I have an appointment with a new RE on Wednesday.

Now I'm off to get up to speed at work for a Monday morning...til tonight y'all!

Menu Plan Monday

You can find out more about Menu Plan Monday at I'm an Organizing Junkie.
It has been a ridiculously long time since I have done one of these. After all the craziness with my dad being in the hospital and then getting him back up to speed at home I stopped planning out meals for awhile. I'm getting back on track now though. This week will only have 3 days on it as we leave for Mississippi on Friday after work and won't be back until late Sunday. Also before I delve in I wanted to share two things I made yesterday. The first is for anyone trying to be heart-healthy (like my dad now) but craving sweets. This cake is amazing and was so quick and easy to make. My dad may have eaten the whole thing by now! :) For dinner last night I decided to try something new to us - Arroz con Pollo. It was delicious and we are adding it to our lineup of go to meals!

Now on to this abbreviated week -

Monday - Minestrone
Tuesday - Blackened Tilapia, Brown Rice, Steamed Broccoli
Wednesday - My Daddy's 61st Birthday Dinner
Thursday -Chicken and Dumplings - I modify by adding Carrots and using Vegeta Seasoning

Just a quick note

To the persons using a proxy to access my site. Your IP address still shows up and I know exactly who each of you is. I blocked you for a reason. Please get your own life and find someone else to cyberstalk.

Mmmkay..thanks.

Five Question Friday/Friday Follow

Today's Five Question Friday is brought to you by ovulation, an upset stomach, and the hope that my appetite returns soon! I'm still battling this bug and I really want to be able to eat again. This sucks. I can't even brush my teeth properly.

Mama M over at My Little Life hosts 5QF so go visit her and join in the fun!

1. Take your pick...date night, girls night out, or night out alone?

Date night - I love when we go down town and get to eat outside then wander around for a bit and cap it off with an ice cream.

2. Can you touch your nose with your tongue?

Nope, I can't fold it either. Lame I know. But I can roll my r's!

3. What is your favorite flower and why?

Gerber Daisy. It was my Mom's favorite flower when I was growing up and I guess it just stirs up some good memories for me. I actually used them as my wedding flowers.

4. If you could go back in time, what advice would you give yourself?

You don't need to save the world or fix everyone. Take care of yourself first - that is what's important.

5. If you won the lottery, what is the very first thing you would do?

Pay off my dad's medical bills and get him the treatment he needs.

Shameless Plug and other irrelevant news

First off - Sorry that I haven't been commenting back much to everyone that stops by. I am fighting a stomach bug that has left me with no appetite and zero energy to boot. I think I'm finally starting to feel better so hopefully I can catch up over the weekend.

Now for my shameless plug - I finally made a button for my blog! It's in my sidebar and I would be tickled pink you decide to grab it.Let me know if you do and I will gladly return the favor!

Finally the irrelevant news, unless you are really riveted by my trying to conceive drama, then it's relevant. My Ob/Gyn has decided he will no longer be doing IUI's in his office due to a bunch of legalities concerned with it. I understand completely and can't fault him for covering his um assets if you will. My original thinking when I found that out was - well I'll just stick it out with the Clomid a bit longer and see what happens. Given my incredible patience and the fact that we are now on Cycle l8 no baby in sight, that resolve lasted 12 hours or so. I called a new Fertility Clinic yesterday and booked an appointment for the end of the month.

Joey is now completely on board for this and is super involved in all of the decisions which make me feel much better. I just didn't feel that the previous clinic was thorough enough with testing and really cared about me as a patient. I know more now and can ask for the tests which haven't been done. This office also has a much higher success rate than the other and comes very highly recommended. Keep your fingers crossed for me that they will be the ones with the magic solution for us!

Pour Your Heart Out - The Money Pit

Shell over at Things I Can't Say hosts - Pour Your Heart Out.

Click over to her to read the Rules.

In the past week I have spent an exorbitant amount of money.

Not by choice either.

It started off with getting our tax return! Exciting right? I was thrilled at first. We paid Joey's aunt back some money she loaned us when we bought our house, pretty much paid off our credit cards and I was going to get new furniture for the living room. After 3 years of waiting.

Then reality decided to rear its ugly head. On Saturday I had to drag the dog to the vet. He has succeeded in chewing half his fur off and scratching himself raw due to allergies. I went ahead and brought the cat too since I was going anyway. We ended up with 4 shots between the two of them, two physicals, a negative heartworm test, a new flea medication and a dog that is still chewing at himself. That cost me $200.

While I was there Joey called, the clutch on his truck was going out. His truck that we bought a year ago and he has already put 40,000 miles on. There went another $300 or so.

Monday - Joey had to get his dental work finished. Over $1800 worth. I paid half of that yesterday and the remainder will be paid when he goes back at the end of the month. That hurt - a lot. Joey's teeth have been an ongoing project for us. At this point I have probably spent upwards of $3,000 on them. Unfortunately his teeth were not well taken care of in the past and we are paying for it now. Fillings, crowns, root canals, fine scale cleanings, yada, yada yada - ching ching ching.

To top it all off, we are supposed to go pick up my stepson Devin next Friday from Mississippi. That means we have to have money to drive up there, for day camp, and to entertain him. I have no idea where that money is going to come from.

Why is is that every time you feel like you are going to be able to get ahead the shit hits the fan and you are right back where you started? I would really love to have a savings account again that has a respectable amount of money in it. I don't need anything ludicrous but enough to replace an engine or transmission would be nice. At this rate I better start looking at bicycles instead though! I know we aren't along in the money struggles and that we are blessed to be able to make ends meet. I just hope that one day we will be able to do more than just get by.

Post It Note Tuesday - A Shot of Novocaine

Today's Post-It notes are brought to you by my dwindling checking account, weird late night movies, and fried okra! (Made some fresh last night and it was delish)!

That's all I have for ya today!

Not Me Monday

Not Me Monday was created by MckMama -- It's an opportunity to get a little therapy for all those things you would never do, but did :) Click here for all the rules.

I did not spend a ridiculous amount of money at the grocery store on Friday despite the stack of coupons I had. This may not be attributed to the fact that we did not make it to the grocery store until 8:30 at night and my refusal to go to Wal-mart since I do not break into hives at the thought of Wal-mart.

I also did not convince my mom to buy me an italian ice on Saturday since at 27 I can certainly buy my own.

I did not spend yesterday afternoon having a pity party for myself after an insensitive neighbor told me we needed a baby. I have built up a much thicker skin then that.

A Buffet of Sorts (Alternate Title - I couldn't decide what to write about)

Today is our second wedding anniversary. I could write about our marriage and all sorts of wonderful things related to that but I already did. Last week. Here.

That would also require energy and effort I can't exert right now. I had to wake up at 5:20 this morning and was at work by 6:30 since Joey dropped me off today. He is using my car as the clutch is going out in his truck. We ordered a new one and $360 later the parts should be here today. Did I also mention that I am shelling out over $1700 at the dentist today to finish his dental work? And the $200 at the Vet on Saturday? No? Well that sobbing sound you hear is me since there goes my money for new couches. Maybe I'll just show off Joey's teeth and the dog's ass and tail that are no longer raw and bloody when people come over?

In other news, I was reading a book yesterday on what else - trying to conceive - and came across what the weight range I should be at for ideal fertility. According to this chart I need to gain 11 POUNDS. You read that correctly - I said 11! Do you have any idea how much weight that is for me? I don't even think I am capable of eating that much! Can I call my gynecologist and request a feeding tube be inserted? Maybe I'll just contact Wendy's instead and have them drop the machine to make these off at my house instead -
 
Nevertheless,  I'm going to commit myself to putting the weight on since it is important not only in order for me to get pregnant but also so I can have a healthy pregnancy. Joey is working on getting healthier himself to help our efforts along so I have to suck it up and do the same. Who knows? Maybe my boobs will finally get bigger too? (Hey, A girl can dream!)

Why thank you - I did want some salt rubbed in that wound!

So, my morning started off pretty well. Got some snuggling from the hubby. The dog wasn't chewing himself raw anymore (after a $200 vet visit for his allergies!). I got a sweet text message from my sister wishing me a happy mother's day for being such a good stepmom to my step son.

Joey decided to take me out to breakfast so we hit up DD and had some iced coffee. Then we ran some errands, wandered the flea market etc. My parents called during that time to say they were coming over so we headed home.

(Insert storm clouds and dramatic music here)

We pulled up to the house and the neighbor was across the street. I swear to you that without a hello or anything she says to us - "You know what you need? A BABY!" My entire face fell and I was lost for a response at the time. Thanks a bunch lady for reminding me on Mother's Day of the one thing I have been trying so hard for and haven't been able to have yet. Thanks for ruining my perfectly good day. Joey pointed out that she had no idea that we are having troubles and I shouldn't hold it against her but if you don't know - don't say anything. It put me in a funk for the rest of today. In honor of her rude comment I have decided to start a list of appropriate responses to that suggestion. Feel free to add on -

"Sure - just hand over $15,000 for IVF and I'll pop one right out for you."

"We're actually both gay and just got married for the benefits package at work. It's all a farce"

"As soon as the courts clear me of those charges and give me the go ahead we certainly will"

"I'm sorry - I didn't realize that our sex life was any of your business"

"We're saving up for a horse instead"

"We're celibate"

"Why are you giving some away?"

Am I bitter? oh yes - ridiculously so. I still had a nice time with my parents and appreciate the hubby trying to brighten my day but people like that really get to me. Is it too much to ask that people mind their own business sometimes?

5QF/Friday Follow - Fried Cake Anyone?

Today's edition of 5QF and Friday Follow is brought to you by renewed hope (more about that later),  Vanilla Iced Coffee, and the Cookie Monster. I am thrilled that Friday finally arrived and that my new favorite song "Rude Boy" is playing at the moment. Side note - I have hated every other song Rihanna has ever put out!

Mama M over at My Little Life hosts 5QF so go visit her and join in the fun!

1. What is your worst memory of your siblings?

This can be a somewhat touchy subject in our family. As noted way back in the beginnings of my blog, we have a touchy and somewhat precarious situation so for that one I will put the state of the relationship as my worst memory.

For my middle sister its finding out about the car accident she had where her Mazda 626 was hit by a Winnebago three times and she was lifeflighted to the hospital.

2. What was YOUR naughtiest childhood memory? (Must be something YOU did, no pawning it off on someone else!)

I can't say what the naughtiest was and my memory is of course failing me now that I have to answer so I will go with the time my sister, her best friend and I decided to make a cake. At 5 in the morning. We weren't allowed to use the oven so we made it in a saucepan on the stovetop - where it of course burned. IN MY MOM's BEST PAN. We were caught in the bathroom, scraping it out with forks.

3. Where do you like to go to relax?

My bathtub, the beach, or a park in the blanket - while accompanied by a good book.

4. What was the last thing you won?

Honestly - I can't remember. I haven't done anything lately where I won something. I have gotten some freebies in the mail recently though. Does that count?

5. If you could be on a game show, which would you choose?

Jeopardy - I think it would be a great challenge and perfect for my brainiac ways!

Welcome to everyone stopping by from Friday Follow too! Hope we become BFF's!

5 Days

 In 5 days, Joey and I will have been married for 2 years. I can honestly say the time has flown by. I use to think that at some point I would regret how quickly we pulled off our wedding and the fact that it wasn't as grand as I had fantasized about.

I was wrong.

I am eternally grateful that we did pull our wedding off when we did. The scare with my dad and the hospital made me so happy that I did get to have my Dad walk me down the aisle and share a dance with me. I hate to think of missing out on that. Being married has been the reason for toughing through some of the hard times in our relationship - you don't say for better or until I don't fell like dealing with it anymore. Sometimes the worse parts really suck but you get through it - somehow.

On our way to our getaway last weekend we had to stop by Joey's Uncle's house, who married us, and lives behind the church we were married in. As we pulled up to the church I said to him - Do you want to get married again? Just seeing the church gave me so much joy from the wonderful memories we had. I honestly would not change a thing about our wedding. It was small, intimate and shared with those we loved the most. Joey and I only had eyes for each other throughout the ceremony and I honestly don't remember anyone else being there.

I hope that God graces us with children soon and that we continue to grow and develop as husband and wife. I look forward to another 50 years or so with him and plan to love every minute of it.

Pour Your Heart Out - No more Apologies

Shell over at Things I Can't Say hosts - Pour Your Heart Out.

Click over to her to read the Rules.


You can keep your apologies, I don't want them. I have heard you say I'm sorry so many times I no longer believe it. I think you are sorry that I don't accept or excuse your actions and that quite frankly I no longer care. I have lost faith and hope in you and doubt that you will ever really change. I don't see the desire to be a better person in you. I think you are quite content to just keep existing in life but not fully engaging. So please - stop apologizing.

I look at you and see a child who will never mature to a full adult. I hope that you will prove me wrong but forgive me for not holding my breath until that happens. It saddens me to think that you willingly let life and all your talents pass you by due to the fear of change. I think you would find life to be incredibly fulfilling if you in fact chose to live it. I will continue to care for you and love you but I am going to put myself first from now on. I haven't done that in ages and recently realized that I deserve to be important sometimes too.

I hope that you do find it in you to grow, change and become the person you are capable of being, I just don't know if I will have the patience to wait and see when that will happen.